{"id":10426,"date":"2020-03-01T16:34:29","date_gmt":"2020-03-01T23:34:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/btsadv.wpengine.com\/?p=10426"},"modified":"2020-03-01T16:34:34","modified_gmt":"2020-03-01T23:34:34","slug":"survivor-story-victimhood-and-survivory-do-not-own-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\/?p=10426","title":{"rendered":"Survivor Story: \u201cVictimhood\u201d and \u201cSurvivory\u201d Do Not Own Me"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Written by: KayLa N. Allen, MPH (Director of Operations, BTSADV)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Each of us experiences triggers and emotions from\ntime-to-time. Today has been one of those days for me. School is heavy right\nnow, and I am navigating through that as well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>As I watched one of my favorites shows, I saw that they had\nincorporated domestic violence into the script, and it bothered me most today\nwhen I realized that I had experienced some of those latent fears and worries,\njust as this character in the show had.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To top things off, while I was watching this show, I also\nhappened to be filling out some paperwork for a new doctor, and two questions\non there were:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\"><li><em>Have you ever been sexually abused?<\/em><\/li><li><em>Have you ever been physically abused?<\/em><\/li><\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>The answer to both was yes. I do not know why, but I broke\ndown and started crying as I continued answering the probing questions. I think\nI felt a little embarrassed, and I immediately had a flashback to a few dark\ndays. Now, of course, we all have to go to the doctor, and we all see or hear\nthings that can be triggering at any level. Is it fair? No. However, we all\nhave to learn that the pain of the past and label of \u201csurvivor\u201d does not\nidentify or own us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>As I navigate through life and evolve and getting closer and\ncloser to whom I am called to be, I see how far I have come, and I am thankful\nfor having overcome so much. Emotions are real. Pain is real. Navigating\nthrough the thought or feeling of both of them can be beyond difficult, but it\nis necessary.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"alignright size-large is-resized\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/022820-KayLa-Picture-1.jpeg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-10428\" width=\"343\" height=\"515\"\/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>To empower myself, I found a moment to listen to \u201cBird Set\nFree\u201d by Sia and \u201cA Little Too Much\u201d by Shawn Mendez. The songs reminded me\nthat in all things, there can be a day when things are difficult beyond\nmeasure, and even \u201cstrong\u201d people can feel \u201cweak\u201d sometimes \u2013 but that is okay.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Somethings can get heavy. Some things can try and silence\nyou. We must all remember that getting through life and being a conqueror and\nthriver in all aspects takes work. You do not have to ignore your feelings, but\nyou cannot stay in them and learn from the lessons you are gifted with.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So, when your days feel low, and you feel like you want to\nbreak down and cry, do it. Just do not forget to empower yourself and find a\nglimmer of positivity afterward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Nothing can ever silence me again. I will continue to Break the\nSilence Against Domestic Violence and live in my purpose, no matter how\ndifficult things get.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>**If you or someone\nyou know is in an abusive relationship, there is help. You can visit the Break\nthe Silence website at <\/em><a href=\"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\"><em>www.breakthesilencedv.org<\/em><\/a><em>, chat with one of our helpline advocates at\n855-287-1777, or send a private message through our Facebook page.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>========<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What\u2019s YOUR Raw Truth?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sharing our stories can be incredibly empowering while also\nhelping others connect with survivors who have similar experiences. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>If you are inspired to share your story with us, <a href=\"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\/break-your-silence\/\">submit here<\/a>. You\ncan choose to remain anonymous.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Written by: KayLa N. Allen, MPH (Director of Operations, BTSADV) Each of us experiences triggers and emotions from time-to-time. Today has been one of those days for me. School is heavy right now, and I am navigating through that as well. As I watched one of my favorites shows, I saw that they had incorporated [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[90,117,143,72,128],"class_list":["post-10426","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-break-your-silence","tag-domestic-violence","tag-physical-abuse","tag-sexual-abuse","tag-sexual-assault","tag-trauma"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Survivor Story: \u201cVictimhood\u201d and \u201cSurvivory\u201d Do Not Own Me - Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\/?p=10426\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Survivor Story: \u201cVictimhood\u201d and \u201cSurvivory\u201d Do Not Own Me - Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Written by: KayLa N. 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