{"id":18763,"date":"2024-02-01T15:49:39","date_gmt":"2024-02-01T22:49:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\/?p=18763"},"modified":"2024-05-13T16:02:30","modified_gmt":"2024-05-13T23:02:30","slug":"breaking-free-from-a-traumatic-relationship-my-story-of-survival-by-lulu-m","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\/?p=18763","title":{"rendered":"“Breaking Free from a Traumatic Relationship: My Story of Survival” By Lulu M"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
 <\/td>I\u2019m 32 and he is 31 I met this guy on Halloween night of 2021 a month after I recently broke up with my kid dad. He was working at the time at KFC. So that night I decided to go there to get food for my kid. I was amazed and how pleasant he was through the speaker phone , He was charming, and when I pulled to the order window he was handsome. I asked for his number if I can have it. He explained to me that he just got out of prison 4 months prior and he don\u2019t have a phone yet . But can I give him my number I stated okay and gave him my number but before I drove off I laughed you better Call me ! He laughed and said he will ! So I was waiting for the call and he didn\u2019t call that night but called the next day and I stated why didn\u2019t you call the day that I stated he said I didn\u2019t want to disrespect and call late ! I stated understood ! So as we began talking I asked him if he didn\u2019t mind me asking what he went to prison for he stated he set his girlfriend apartment on fire ! I was scared at first but it is a saying you never suppose to judge anyone because everyone has flaws I even have flaws and run ins with the law before. I asked him why did he do it he stated because she cheated on me! I said oh wow why didn\u2019t you just leave! He stated he was just hurt by it! So we continued to talk and he invited me to his home ! So I came over and I met his mom and at first she seemed nice but as the relationship went on we didn\u2019t get along ! So as we started communicating more we then began hanging out and the first notice of issues in the relationship I grabbed his phone one day because it was ringing and I was just going to give him his phone we were out in the restaurant and he yelled at me to never touch his phone ! Why was I going through his phone ?! I stated I didn\u2019t go through your phone someone was calling and I was just going to give you the phone I\u2019m sorry ! So the next incident I walked in the gas station to buy snacks because we were headed to the beach and because me and one of the employees were briefly chatting he was watching me through the window and got out of the car as I was going to walk to the counter I ended up forgetting something and went to go get the item ! He has this mean look on his face, and walked up to me and stated \u201cshould he embarrass me right now\u201d? I stated \u201cno\u201d what did I do? He then began to get loud and now all of the customers are looking at me and I was embarrassed to even pay for my items but I ended up paying for my items and then leaving! I asked him \u201cwhy did he do that\u201d? He stated \u201cwhy am I smiling in another man face\u201d? \u201cWhat was so funny\u201d? I stated I know him it was just a friendly conversation and he stated the next time I do that \u201che will knock my teeth out\u201d! I stated \u201cknock my teeth out\u201d ? No you will not so as I\u2019m driving he leaned over in my face and grabbed me by my face and stated \u201cI won\u2019t do what\u201d? I didn\u2019t say nothing ! I was then hurt and embarrassed! I let that incident go as well and continued talking to him ! So another time is when I was at his house and his dad was there and I said something he didn\u2019t like. I\u2019m not sure what I said and he began choking me and I screamed \u201cdon\u2019t choke me\u201d ! And his dad came out of the room and asked him \u201cwhy is he doing that\u201d? \u201cWhy is he being abusive\u201d he told his dad \u201cto mind his business\u201d he can do what he want ! \u201cI belong to him\u201d ! A few moments later I decided to leave but he called me and stated he was sorry and wanted me to come over and like a fool I came over and this time with my kids. So moments later i was trying to speak to him and he wouldn\u2019t respond so after feeling unwanted for a while I stated to him \u201cI\u2019m going to leave and he got upset and snatched all of my belongings including phone charger, baby items, and started throwing them and I picked them up put it in the carrier that I had and he pushed me and yelled \u201cget out\u201d ! So I tried to leave he tried to stop me and I stated I need to go I\u2019ll be back and then he called me and stated for me to come back I stated \u201cno not tonight\u201d. \u201cIt\u2019s not good to come back tonight! So another time we was driving in the car to a restaurant and I bought me some food and he was in the car and as I was walking out a guy was holding the door for me and I told the guy \u201cthank you\u201d he jumped out of the car and I was walking up to the car to get in he made the comment \u201cthe next time I smile in a guy face he was going to harm me\u201d and the guy ! I stated \u201cI don\u2019t know him\u201d he was just being nice ! So as I was driving he began opening my food ! I stated \u201cput it back\u201d I bought that food for me\u201d! You didn\u2019t buy it ! He said \u201cso\u201d and we are tussling over my food while I\u2019m driving and then he put it back and put his hand around my neck so tight while I was driving ! I stated \u201cplease can you stop\u201d ! I can\u2019t breath ! It hurts ! Minutes later he let go ! My neck was hurting and he said he wasn\u2019t sorry ! Because he is tired of me trying to \u201cback talk him\u201d ! So as the times went on the abuse got worse! One day after he asked me to come over to his house I told him I will only stay outside I\u2019m not coming in! He stated okay that\u2019s fine! A hour after that his mom came outside and wanted me off of her property we began arguing , I stated I\u2019m not on your property what problem do you have with me besides that night that I came to your home because your son asked me too ! And I was with my kids ! So that was the final straw for me atleast I thought I left from their house and I stated to him after he decided to call ! I said I\u2019m not going to be with you no more ! I can\u2019t do this no more I\u2019m done ! He apologized and stated he talked with his mom and he is sorry for the way he has been abusive I stated until you make a promise to not be abusive we can\u2019t talk no more ! He promised me and I felt for it like a fool ! So as the weeks went on everything was going okay until one day he grabbed my phone and found a text from me and another guy and accused me of being sexually active with him which i stated he was just a friend! I never slept with him! We were not on good terms so I just wanted someone to talk with ! He gave me my phone and remained silent until I drop my kids back off home with my aunt and he asked me to come over so we can talk! I stated okay give me a minute ! So I came over to his house he was in the patio area in the dark I stated \u201cwhy are you in the dark\u201d he stated because he wanted to be ! He was \u201coutside smoking a cigarette\u201d ! I stated \u201cyou smoke cigarettes\u201d? I didn\u2019t know that ! \u201cCan we go inside\u201d? He said \u201cNO\u201d! \u201cWe are going to be out here\u201d ! I said \u201cokay\u201d! \u201cso what do you want to talk about\u201d? He stated \u201cwhy did I cheat on him\u201d? I stated \u201cI didn\u2019t cheat on you\u201d ! He then punched me in the face ! \u201cI screamed so loud\u201d and started crying hysterically ! I stated \u201cwhy did you just hit me\u201d ?! He stated \u201cbecause I just lied to him\u201d! I then tried to leave ! He pulled out a long knife behind the sofa ! And stated \u201cif I leave he will kill me\u201d ! So I stood there \u201cholding my face\u201d he continued to interrogate me accusing me of cheating ! I stated repeatedly \u201cI didn\u2019t cheat\u201d ! He continued punching me to the point where my head began to hurt at that point his dad came out and stated that he is going to jail if he hit me one more time\u201d ! He then began to argue with his father\u201d ! His father told him\u201d to fight him\u201d why is he fighting on women \u201c! He stated he will fight men or women\u201d! I then began crying nonstop begging him to please let me leave \u201c! He out the knife to my throat and stated \u201cI wasn\u2019t going anywhere\u201d ! So I thought in my head if I wanted to live to just act like I care\u201d and admit to cheating so he could stop hitting me and let me leave ! So after I stated \u201cI love you \u201c! I\u2019m sorry that I cheated\u201d ! \u201cPlease let me check on my kids\u201d my aunt has them and I have to go back home\u201d I promise I will come back\u201d .. he then snapped in reality and stated \u201cokay\u201d I will let you go ! But you better come back and if I have to come looking for you it\u2019s not going to be nice\u201d ! I stated I will! So I came back and everything was okay I stayed to conversate but later left! From that moment I stated I will not speak to him again! But once again his charming talks got me ! the other incident and final incident was when we were together I picked him up from his home and I\u2019m not sure how it happened but I believe we had got into a argument because he wanted to see me and I stated I was coming and because I took so long he called me 20 times nonstop and I stated that \u201cI was coming\u201d! But he was upset and stated \u201che is walking, looking for me\u201d ! And I stated \u201cI\u2019m on my way now! He was upset by his voice on the phone ! I called him back because he hung on me and I stated \u201cplease I\u2019m sorry I don\u2019t want to fight\u201d I was trying to find medicine for my kid\u201d he stated to \u201churry up and get to him\u201d ! As soon as he opened my door he punched me so hard with my baby in my hand\u201d ! And I tried to drive off he started punching me repeatedly I began screaming loud and the other witnesses seen it but he yelled for me to drive and even tried to push me out of the car ! I said \u201cno\u201d I am going to the police ! \u201cHe picked up my phone and hit me in the head\u201d and a large knot developed instantly! In the middle of my head ! I stated why did you hit me in the head\u201d ?! Please get out\u201d , please \u201c! I can\u2019t do this anymore\u201d ! He stated \u201cso you leaving me\u201d ! I was so scared but I stated yes\u201d! He started punching me harder ! So I took him where he wanted me too and as he was talking with his friend \u201chis friend seen that I was crying\u201d ! He stayed to him \u201cbro what are you doing\u201d ? \u201cDon\u2019t beat on her\u201d ! He stated \u201che was going to teach me a lesson\u201d since I like playing games\u201d ! He tried to convince him \u201cno it is not the way to do things\u201d ! He didn\u2019t care ! Soon as I begin taking him home 5 minutes from his home he began choking me from the backseat while I was drivin and I instantly put the car in park while I\u2019m trying to get loose! I was gasping for air \u201ctelling him I couldn\u2019t breathe\u201d! He told me to open the sunroof ! I screamed \u201cI can\u2019t breathe please\u201d. I have my kid\u201d so my 5 month old began to cry\u201d I instantly got into motherhood mode and turned around grabbed my pocket knife because I was going to kill him ! I was tired of him beating on me ! And as we began tussling for the knife I didn\u2019t want him to get it but I was trying to escape the car as well to run for help! So he ended up cutting his hand and I he screamed so he let me go and I jumped out of the car by opening the door and then grabbing my baby I had no shoes on and I walked as fast as I can and a bystander who seen it all stated to \u201ckeep walking she is calling the cops\u201d I said \u201che is trying to kill me\u201d! Please help! I left my car there and began walking barefooted ! So another bystander was driving by asking him \u201cwhat was the problem why was he bleeding\u201d he stated he \u201ccut himself\u201d and I raned back to the car soon as he got out and was away from the car and I sped off ! And parked in the parking lot by dollar general and just began crying ! A police was already called and he approached me and stated \u201c he received a domestic call was I okay\u201d ? I said \u201cyes\u201d I just broke up with my boyfriend I just want him to leave me alone\u201d he asked did I want to press charges \u201c I said no\u201d ! \u201cI just want him to leave me alone \u201c! The only reason why I didn\u2019t press charges because I knew he was going back to prison because he wasn\u2019t allowed to get out of prison and commit a crime within 2 years I believe of 3 years due to DOC policy ! Moments later he calling me back to back I had numerous missed calls 50+ I wasn\u2019t answering, even texted messages saying he don\u2019t know what he was doing he sorry! I know I\u2019m never going to talk to him again but please just hear him out\u201d! I answered \u201cno\u201d I\u2019m done ! \u201cYou tried to kill me\u201d please leave me alone\u201d! He stated he wanted to go to the ER I said \u201cno\u201d ! \u201cDont text me or call me anymore\u201d! Long story short that was the last straw I didn\u2019t speak to him again! I found that he moved and one day he found me on social media and started to reach out I never responded! I learned my lesson! This hasn\u2019t been my first domestic relationship but it was my worse and last! Never again! I now have a permanent pain in my head where he hit me with my phone causing a dent in the middle of my skull! But thank god I am still alive to tell my story!<\/td><\/tr><\/tbody><\/table><\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  I\u2019m 32 and he is 31 I met this guy on Halloween night of 2021 a month after I recently broke up with my kid dad. He was working at the time at KFC. So that night I decided to go there to get food for my kid. I was amazed and how pleasant […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":164,"featured_media":18227,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,344],"tags":[92,162,90,665,116,117,115,374,128,34],"class_list":["post-18763","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-break-your-silence","category-survivor-stories","tag-abuse","tag-btsadv","tag-domestic-violence","tag-eltmpl","tag-emotional-abuse","tag-physical-abuse","tag-survivor","tag-survivor-stories","tag-trauma","tag-verbal-abuse"],"yoast_head":"\n"Breaking Free from a Traumatic Relationship: My Story of Survival" By Lulu M - Break the Silence Against Domestic Violence<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A survivor shares a harrowing account of her abusive relationship, detailing the violence and manipulation she endured. 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