{"id":20255,"date":"2025-08-14T16:26:40","date_gmt":"2025-08-14T23:26:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\/?p=20255"},"modified":"2025-08-14T16:27:02","modified_gmt":"2025-08-14T23:27:02","slug":"the-price-of-peace-is-silence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/breakthesilencedv.org\/?p=20255","title":{"rendered":"The Price of Peace is Silence"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

By Iris Pendelton<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

When the price of peace is silence, do we pay it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Abuse is not confined to dimly lit bedrooms or closed doors behind suburban homes. Sometimes, it wears a uniform. Sometimes, it stands behind a pulpit. And sometimes, it smiles in community meetings or passes laws in a statehouse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Abusers aren\u2019t just partners. They can be police officers, judges, politicians, faith leaders, or other community figures who use their positions of power to avoid accountability. And too often, society not only lets them get away with it. It also protects them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When Power Shields Abuse<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Abusers in power have access to tools the average person doesn\u2019t: networks, influence, public trust, and institutional backing. A police officer who abuses their spouse might use threats of arrest or custody loss to maintain control. A judge accused of abuse might hide behind professional credibility, making survivors seem \u201cunstable\u201d or \u201cvindictive.\u201d Politicians may spin public narratives or bury stories with PR. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then there are faith leaders who preach love and submission while terrorizing those closest to them. In these situations, survivors not only face emotional and physical trauma, but also spiritual manipulation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They\u2019re told that God hates divorce. That suffering is part of their divine journey. That submission is a virtue, even when it comes at the cost of safety and sanity. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

When Beliefs Become Chains<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

For some, faith offers hope. For others, it becomes a cage. Survivors are often pressured by religious communities to forgive, to stay, to pray harder. They are told that leaving is selfish. That reporting abuse is disrespectful. That being a \u201cgodly\u201d spouse means enduring.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This toxic theology doesn\u2019t just damage survivors, it protects abusers. It allows them to continue their harm with the blessing (or silence) of their community. It creates a culture where the appearance of righteousness matters more than the reality of harm. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

When Communities Choose Silence <\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Even outside of religious spaces, communities often close ranks around abusers. Families defend them. Colleagues turn a blind eye. Friends urge survivors to keep quiet for the sake of peace or reputation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Survivors who speak out are labeled bitter, angry, or unstable. Worse, if they defend themselves, they\u2019re sometimes even accused of being the abuser. The burden of proof is almost always placed on the survivor. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The consequences of speaking up often outweigh the harm of staying silent. And so the cycle continues.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Cost of Silence: Why Survivors Stay Quiet<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

When survivors see abusers protected, uplifted, or even celebrated by their communities, it sends a chilling message: speaking out won\u2019t make you safe. Instead, it might make things worse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Many survivors don\u2019t speak up because they fear they won\u2019t be believed. Or worse, they fear retaliation, character assassination, or losing their children, job, or community. Some fear being shamed or ostracized by those they once trusted the most.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The result? Silence. Isolation. A deep sense of betrayal, not just from the abuser, but from the very systems and people who were supposed to help. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Survivors don\u2019t stay silent because they want to. They stay silent because the world teaches them it’s dangerous to speak.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, What Can Be Done?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n