June 13th 2020
I was emotionally and physically abused by my mom and got away by moving in with my high school boyfriend who began physically and emotionally abusing me. It was typical as it started little a slap here and lots of remorse then we decided to have a baby and get married we were absolutely poor he wouldn’t work a job long before being unemployed I worked as a retail clerk and a waitress we had 2 more kids without my consent and one of them I ended up bleeding internally and almost died. While I was in the hospital he took the time off work and went to Disneyland with his sister. It got worse and worse we were homeless from time to time and he beat me every time I was pregnant. He used to spit in my face. That was the worst. Eventually, he beat me and raped me and I finally left him after he passed out drunk. I packed my kids in our van and drove to my sisters. I went back after a few months he promised the world. It got worse. The last 2 episodes were the end…he almost killed me by choking me to the point I blacked out I still don’t know why he stopped but when he did I woke up and couldn’t see out of my left eye….my cheekbone was broken and swollen up over my eyebrow. He had gone outwalked the block and picked a flower from someone’s yard and said he relieved so much anger on me he didn’t think he would have to do it again. Well 2 weeks later he and his BFF were trying to look at porn on my laptop so I changed the password and it sent him into a rage that was the night the police had to GPS my phone to find me and when they arrived I was beaten head to toe with bite marks on my breasts and legs I had locked myself in the bathroom and he was at the door prying the hinges off the door with a knife. They got there just in time. He took off with his BFF and they ended up finding him hiding in the garage with an ax. That was the end. I struggled for years thru DV groups. While he went to Jail for 18 months. While he was in jail he had his mother gain custody of my children lie to dcfs about me and ended up adopting them away from me. I fought for them for 3 years. I had no family or friends to help, no money for a lawyer. It was a losing battle. I haven’t seen them in almost 8 years. I struggle daily with it. I have the complex post-traumatic disorder, anxiety, major depression. I’m suicidal often. It’s hard but seeking help and therapy helps.