How Do You Survive An Attack Of Strangulation With A Narcissist?

Strangulation is an unfortunate reality for many women. Follow this guide to help survive an attack of strangulation and take steps to leave an abusive relationship.

When I look at narcissism through the vulnerability lens, I see the shame-based fear of being ordinary. I see the fear of never feeling extraordinary enough to be noticed, lovable, belong, or cultivate a sense of purpose.

We have heard women stating, “I got strangled on my honeymoon. I didn’t even know that was abuse. I didn’t know what to do. While dating him, he never tried to strangle me, even when red flags were around but not enough to convince me that I was in love with a narcissist, and I ended up marrying one.”

A statement like this may seem quite familiar because we have heard them repeatedly, but what have we done about them is the question. Have we tried to lay down a strong foundation for telling women how to save themselves before the situation arises where they might get killed?

Devastatingly pervasive: 1 in 3 women globally experience violence – Younger women among those most at risk: WHO

The situation may appear out of hand, but we can still educate people about the issue. Hence, we are sharing the guidelines on how one could survive an attack by a narcissist.

1. Educate Yourself About Narcissism

It’s essential to educate yourself on this subject. Strangulation is a subject you don’t learn in schools or colleges until and unless you pursue a specific professional course. But this subject emerges as the need of the hour because 1 in 3 women fall prey to narcissistic abuse without realizing it is abuse in the first place. Sit at the kitchen counter, make a cup of coffee and start reading about narcissism. Doing so can help you detect narcissists in the first few glances.

2. Create Healthy Boundaries

Establish boundaries and do everything in your power to stick to them. Learn to remove yourself from abusive situations as much as possible. Sometimes you cannot if you are living with abuse in the same abode, but there are ways to tackle that too. Disengage and go outside for a walk or to sit on a bench before an abusive person causes you harm. Taking these steps will send a strong message to your abuser that you are not ready to have an offensive discussion. Instead, you have learned to say no to their manipulative tricks.

3. Write About Your Expectations

Narcissists will not show mercy to you, but you have to show mercy to yourself. If the abusive situation has reached a point where they’re prepared to strangle you, then it’s time to pen down the expectations you have for yourself. If you don’t write one, then start writing one either in your phone or diary. Write down your answers to these questions:

  • What makes you stay with the narcissist?
  • Why are you finding it hard to leave the narcissist?
  • Why are you enduring the abuse?
  • What steps will you take to leave this situation?

4. Keep An Eye On The Narcissist

When a narcissist is hurting you consistently and uninvitingly, it’s your time to showcase the mirror to the narcissist – but not violently. By living with the narcissist for so long, you know what makes him angry, what his limitations are, and how those limitations could be beaten by you when the right time comes. Please create a list and plan your life while keeping an eye on his limits.

5. Not Every War Is Meant To Be Fought

You don’t have to please the narcissist, nor have you to enrage the narcissist. You become smart if your goals are clear in mind. If the narcissist asks you something that doesn’t make you feel right, nod or leave it immediately. By avoiding minor conflicts in the short term, you can save yourself from further abuse as you plan your exit strategy. For instance: If a narcissist wants you to compliment him on the new shirt that he is wearing, do that so that he doesn’t get an idea of your true intentions. Focus your energy on your plan of leaving him forever. You have to fake it at times to safeguard yourself.

6. Don’t Feel Guilty About Yourself

It takes bones of steel to live with a narcissist, so never feel guilty about becoming manipulative while living with him. You are not doing that intentionally; that’s your surviving spirit kicking in so that you can start afresh once you leave this narcissistic abusive relationship. Sometimes we must become like the one hurting us in order to leave them without hurting ourselves. Give yourself a break from enduring the abuse rather than blaming yourself for being selfish. Thinking about you is not selfish.

Final Words

Don’t hesitate to ask for help when you need it. Don’t hesitate to go out and breathe fresh air when you need it. Don’t hesitate to lay down a path for yourself that you always deserved because you owe this much to yourself. A relationship with a narcissist is a direct sign of letting someone know that it’s better to live without a relationship than living with a monster to ruin your peace of mind.

I hope the tips and tricks in this article help you survive the narcissist and give you enough courage to leave a narcissistic abusive relationship.

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