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Manipulation and gaslighting

My abuser is my child’s father, he started mentally abusing me little after we started dating but I did not realize till later. The manipulation and gaslighting began after a few months and when I got pregnant (thanks to being drunk and him saying he was using protection but wasn’t) is when the more emotional and degrading abuse started. In the first 3-4 months I was pregnant and in a relationship with him at the time, it got to the point of if I was having morning sickness or just not in the mood every day, he would try to manipulate me to doing what he wanted and guilt me until I caved. When that didn’t always work, he began the more intense sexual abuse by me waking up in the middle of the night to him raping me or sexually assaulting me. Him having fits when he would not get his way got to the point where he would hit or throw all around me to get me to cower and cave to what he wanted. Then the night (around 4 months) I left was because he went to punch my stomach or act like he would…I dropped to the ground and crawled to my purse and ran out. He unfortunately still tries to manipulate and gaslight me into trying to see our child.

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