My story of survival began about five and a half years ago. I had known this person for many years at the point we finally decided to start dating. I knew how he treated all of his ex’s, which was horrible, but I kept thinking that he wouldn’t do that to me because we had known each other and had been friends for so long. I was so wrong. The abuse began just 3 short months in. The first incident is still sketched in my mind. He screamed directly in my face, nose to nose for absolutely no reason. (I jokingly messed up the bed covers being silly as I usually am) I remember his spit flying in my face and the warmth of his breath as I was literally frozen. This was only the tip of the iceberg, unfortunately. I stayed with this person for so long, and only because I fell in love with his beautiful daughter, who he would constantly threaten me with. I stayed for her and her only. He knew that. He ended up taking her from me just 7 months ago, his one last jab at hurting me I guess. Typical Narcissistic behavior.
At least once a week, I was abused mentally or verbally. A few years in, he finally laid hands on me and he went to jail for Domestic Violence. Still, I stayed because as usual, he was threatening to take his daughter from me. I tried to break free so many times during those four and a half years. I was looking for a way out, any way out. I didn’t care at the time. I just wanted to be free from all of it, but I could never follow through because of my bond with and my love for his daughter, and as I said, he knew that. I finally broke free almost two years ago, and I’ve slowly and steadily been healing from the damage that he has caused me. I was trauma bonded to this “man” due to the high highs and low lows that he was constantly giving me, so breaking free was a huge deal since many never break free from a trauma bond. I healed from it very quickly thankfully, but I’ll never fully heal from losing the love of that child.
I am now living happily with an amazing man who would never dream of hurting me. There is definitely light at the end of the tunnel. Nobody deserves to live in misery or in an abusive relationship.
I am now working in Management, as well as owning my own Photography business with my boyfriend. I Mentor children in my free-time working with a non-profit organization in my area. I absolutely love being a Mentor and helping other children. I also paint, and sell my art online and in local shops.
Life is finally looking up and I am headed in the right direction on my healing journey.
If this short version of my story has helped even just one person, then my job is complete. Remember, you deserve to live happy. This is YOUR life and your life only, so make sure to live it fully!
