In the year 2015, I got married to an abuser. I got to see his true colors in the third week of marriage when he hit me for the first time. I was told that a man can hit a woman and I was expected to adjust in such an abusive environment.
The day kept on passing and I saw my abusive ex-husband hitting his parents. They were accepting his abuse as if it was a reward of their upbringing. When he hit me for the second time, I gave it back to him and realized that his whole family was equally responsible for making the abuse acceptable in the abode.
Seeing all the abuse for a long period of time in my own parental house made me stronger enough not to tolerate it in my ex-in-laws house. When I was away on the professional trip and reached back India, my abusive ex-husband filed the divorce case on me pretending to be an innocent and nice guy.
I was living in an illusion at that point of time, so I kept on asking for the mutual divorce to which he never consented and threatened to kill me. I wasn’t scared by then and searched for a lawyer and started fighting the case. While fighting the case in the Indian judiciary I was considered as a highly educated woman who deserved no maintenance and alimony from the abusive husband.
Yes, you heard it right.
When he was beating me up and degrading me every day at that time Judiciary didn’t question him or the society or the system about making me feel unsafe and suicidal but when it came to ask where it pinched him the most, they considered me an educated woman. I didn’t give up and won my case in 2022.
I was glad at least they were giving me some kind of respect in regard to my education while at my ex-in-laws house, I was merely treated as a doormat. The fight of 4 years of divorce case came to an end in 2022 where I ended it on my own terms. My abusive ex-husband took me for a ride and believed that I would give up so easily, but I didn’t.
Of course, like the majority of the domestic violence abusers, he was a narcissist personality disorder man. But I am glad that the universe departed our ways. I am glad that I am alive. I am here to share my story with you all.
When I went to the court for the first time, somehow, I felt that courage in my bones that I will die fighting this case rather than giving him the comfort of walking away from it.
I fought for my rights. I fought for what was right. I fought because my heart comforted my soul that it was the right decision. And this lesson was so important because women leave men without teaching them anything and they repeat the same cycle of abuse somewhere else with someone new.
I didn’t want to set a weak example for myself or other women. I knew I was fighting for all who have been through abuse.
I fought for those too who are still stuck in an abusive marriage or a relationship and seeking help. I fought for those who have lost their family members to abuse. I fought because I never deserved the miserable life, he created for me. I fought because I knew I wasn’t ready to take abuse in another home. I stood for myself, and I know if I can do it, so can you.
