When we reminisce about first love, it’s often about teenage crushes or special moments with someone else. But today, I challenge you to fall in love with someone even more important—you. Self-love isn’t just important; it’s essential. After all, you’re the one person you’ll always have by your side, whether you’re in a relationship or single. Loving yourself sets the standards for how you allow others to treat you.
During my abusive relationship, I didn’t truly love myself. I saw the relationship as worth saving, but not myself. It wasn’t until I began counseling that I started to cultivate self-love. As it grew, I shifted from trying to save the relationship to saving myself. Eventually, I found the strength to walk away.
A year later, still on my journey of self-love, I met my true love, now my husband. We connected on Facebook and exchanged voice memos, texts, and videos for weeks. His calming presence drew me in, and after our first live phone call, I knew there was something special. Our first date confirmed it—I felt relaxed and authentic around him.
Despite my past abuse, I trusted my heart’s feeling that he was different. We married on February 22, 2022, and he remains the kind, respectful man I fell in love with. Our relationship is built on love, kindness, and respect. His consistent love reassures me daily.
Through this journey, I’ve learned that finding a healthy partner starts with loving yourself. How can you teach someone to love you if you don’t love yourself first? Cultivating self-love prepares you to give and receive healthy love. Before seeking love outside, find your first love within—self-love.