By Stephanie Smith
When it comes to domestic violence (DV), survivors often find that the hardest battles don’t end once they escape the abuse. They quickly realize that getting legal protection, emotional support, and physical help isn’t as straightforward as it seems. In many ways, intimate partner violence (IPV) is not treated with the same seriousness as other forms of violence, especially when it comes to engaging with the legal system.
Many survivors of domestic violence might assume that laws exist to protect them from their abusers, but the sad reality is that these laws often fall short in practice. Legal systems are not equipped to deal with psychological abuse, stalking, or coercive control, which leaves survivors feeling abandoned and misunderstood. If you’ve ever been judged or told that your experience wasn’t “that bad” or that you should simply forgive your abuser, you’re not alone. Countless survivors have faced re-victimization at the hands of a biased legal system, which often sides with the abuser, turning the process of seeking justice into a nightmare.
The Bias Against Survivors
One of the most pervasive issues is the gender bias ingrained in the legal system, particularly in the United States. While men also experience domestic violence, the system tends to be more forgiving toward them as victims compared to women, who often face a heightened level of scrutiny and bias. Women are frequently judged harshly, blamed for staying in the relationship, or criticized for not leaving sooner. This victim-blaming narrative is prevalent, especially when the abuse is emotional or psychological rather than physical.
When survivors seek restraining orders or other forms of legal protection, they encounter an uphill battle. Courts often dismiss claims of coercive control, cyberstalking, and psychological manipulation, focusing only on physical violence, which is easier to prove. This leaves survivors vulnerable and without the protection they so desperately need. In many cases, abusers are able to manipulate the system, filing counterclaims that portray the victim as the aggressor, further complicating the process and delaying the safety and security of the victim.
How the Legal System Perpetuates Abuse
One of the greatest challenges survivors face is in family court, where child custody issues can drag on for months or even years. Abusers often use the legal system to continue their control by creating financial burdens and emotional stress on their victims. This creates a situation where survivors, especially mothers, must constantly defend their mental and emotional stability while the abuser attempts to gain shared custody—a tactic that often puts both the survivor and their children in harm’s way.
The legal system’s failure to recognize coercive control as a form of violence also means that many survivors are left without adequate protections, even when their abusers use indirect methods like digital harassment. Judges, law enforcement officers, and legal professionals often fail to see the full scope of the trauma inflicted by domestic violence, which leads to disastrous outcomes, such as harmful custody arrangements and prolonged exposure to the abuser.
Systemic Failures and the Path Forward
For survivors who belong to marginalized communities, these challenges are further compounded by language barriers, fear of deportation, and other systemic obstacles. Survivors often lack the financial resources or time to keep up with court requirements, such as parenting classes or mandatory appointments, all while managing the emotional toll of their trauma. This creates an environment where abusers are able to weaponize the court system against their victims, using it as a tool for continued manipulation.
It’s critical to recognize that these biases are deeply ingrained in the system, making it incredibly difficult for survivors to navigate. Defense attorneys with no moral compass perpetuate these cycles of re-abuse by manipulating the courts, confusing juries, and often getting away with egregious behavior that only adds to the survivor’s trauma.
Finding Support and Protecting Yourself
While changing the system overnight is unlikely, survivors can take steps to protect themselves. It’s crucial to build a strong support network and not fall prey to the abuser’s ongoing manipulation through the legal system. Survivors need to recognize that while the system may be broken, there are resources available to help them reclaim their power. Understanding that these legal battles are a continuation of the abuse is the first step in freeing yourself from the control of your abuser.
Hashtags:
#DomesticViolence #SurvivorSupport #LegalSystemBias #VictimBlaming #CoerciveControl #EndDV #GenderBias #RestrainingOrders #FamilyCourtChallenges #BreakTheSilence
Keywords: Domestic violence survivors, Legal system bias, Victim blaming, Intimate partner violence, Coercive control, Gender bias in legal systems, Restraining orders, Child custody and domestic violence, Psychological abuse
