By Anonymous Survivor
I’m woman age 30 and still struggling with what my stepfather did to me at my early age. Around 15 to 16 years of age.
At that age he started to approach me tell how he wanted me not my mother. I try talking to him that what his doing wrong and he must stop with all this nonsense. And at that time we were living together at my grandparents house.
After a while he decided to buy a house for mother and my 2 siblings. They moved out and I stayed alone at my grandparents house.
Then after a few months thinking that he stopped thinking about all the nonsense of him being with me was over, but unfortunately I was wrong he made sure the he moved my mother near me so that he could get me while I’m alone.
“So he approached me again and again.”
The third time he was telling me that my mother knows everything. That she’s ok with me being him at that time I refused.
Telling him I am going to ask my mother if it’s true. Then I do that asked my mother, she refused that she know anything.
But the saddest part is that I don’t think she talked to him like a caring mother who is concerned. Nor to call the elders about the situation as she promised.
Because after all that, he started showing up at my grandparents’ house at night wanting to open, but I still refused. The next day I went to my younger brother from my father’s side asked him to stay due to the situation and he came.
He Was A Constant Manipulator
My stepfather then somehow menipulate my mother saying he saw my younger brother doing drugs and he can’t stay with me.
My mother chased him and telling me that I wanna in between him and the father of her children. I couldn’t get what was wrong with my mother. I started losing focus at school I will tear up in the class while the teacher is teaching, my marks dropped.
I told my mother telling I’m not about telling. I don’t understand what I’m doing there cause they are wasting their money.
My Life Became A Nightmare Because of My Stepfather
I then drop out started drinking heavily and smoking cigarettes and weed stayed home.
I became more more useless in her eyes cause my turn out reckless and I didn’t care at all cause the only person I thought that she had my back didn’t chose me as her priority.
After everything, I dated someone. We lived together and I explained everything to him.
Then at the age of 24 I got pregnant with my beautiful baby girl whom I love very much. I got back on my feet. I worked here and there and my baby daddy took care of us fine.
All the while, not knowing that on the other side the person I call my mother was going through a lot.
My stepfather was abusing her for almost 3 years. Cause she didn’t tell, but I was in contact she knew I was pregnant and everything. Until she was beaten up and she was hospitalized.That’s when I find out my stepfather ran away thinking my mother lost her life.
“Then he took his life, too.”
Then I was just, so relieved. I could obviously see that my mother as hurting. But as for me, I was OK. Even today I still don’t know why my mom chose that man. While I was crying my heart out that he was no good.
Even today I still don’t believe that my mother loves me. Even Today She still talks about him like he could wake from the dead. And even today she has never said I’m sorry.
I Tried to forget everything. But I can’t. It still hits me unexpectedly. In my dreams and in my waking hours. I tried forgetting about everything, but I can’t.
Check These Resources:
- Therapeutic Interventions for Healing From Domestic Violence
- The Hidden Impact of Teen Dating Violence
- Find Support with BTSADV
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