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Chris was US…

There have been many opinions about the Chris Rock/Will Smith Oscar moment, but for survivors of domestic violence, we may see ourselves in Chris Rock in that very moment.

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Staged or not, on March 27th, 2022, we watched a man publicly humiliated by physical abuse.


This night exhibited to us worldwide that physical abuse has no gender, age, race, or the right timing. It can happen to anyone at any time man or woman.


As a survivor, many of us are left mouths open, shocked, and confused while still trying to keep our composure when faced with the unexpected reaction from an internally troubled human with momentary insignificance to justify their behavior.


That night, at that moment, Chris was Us!It was in that moment of the unexpected, a flashback of my own abuse was brought to light again from 10 years ago. As a young soldier, I went from living in the single soldier barracks to having a newborn, newly married, into my own home, when I encountered my first introduction to physical abuse.


Chris made a joking statement as I obliged a similar remark. The difference between the two was, I only stated “I was taking my son to church” and needless to say we never made it because he didn’t want anyone to see my face after his reckless behavior from that statement.


We scrutinized a man being emasculated globally and yet kept his composure like many of us have because of our state of shock. Yet some will say the abuser acted out of a compilation of emotions, but it does not justify the pain or trauma that we are left with.

Photo Credit: The Shade Room (Instagram)


Chris’s response is as normal as it gets from survivors like myself and you as we are still, “SURVIVORs but still SURVIVING”, ” I’m still processing what happened”.That statement alone is our general statement for anyone during our healing process or after a traumatic crisis because of the unexpected timing or the person that caused the damage.


My message to Chris: Thank you for keeping your composure in the public eye instead of resulting in retaliation as the aggressor normally expects us to commit. You are not alone, may you have a blessed and speedy recovery process of healing.


Wild fact: Chris Rock openly shared that he suffered from a learning disability called NVLD, also known as a NON-VERBAL LEARNING DISORDER, and how it affects him in day-to-day living.


My message to my fellow survivors: We were Chris, the first day we encountered abuse and Chris is Us.

~Chrissie

Author • Podcast Host • DV Survivor/Advocate 

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