Domestic Violence
As it approaches nearly a year ago on the 24th June I want my story to help others.
No women or children should have to go through this. If you want to leave a relationship you shouldn’t have to feel at fear this goes to women and men!
I was in a 3 year relationship, I won’t go into detail of why I left, but the closest people are aware!
On the 8th June 2022 even days leading up to it my mum went to the police for advice to help and I wasn’t aware but the police become extremely worried for me and I bottled in a lot what happened in the relationship just for I suppose ‘an easier life’ but the police wanted to speak with me. On the 8th June 2022 I went over to my aunts which the police called and asked if they could attend to speak with me and I agreed. The police sat and within a space on 3 minutes I had 53 miss calls, multiple texts, and calls to my aunt and unknown number calls for my ex. This was a normal thing if I didn’t answer which raised more concerns to the police. He got arrested and was released on bail. He had conditions which he wasn’t allowed to contact me or go near the house.
I didn’t stay at my home but a week prior I was brave enough to go back home and try move on with my life hoping he could just be a daddy to his children.
From the 16th to the 23rd June he decided to plan to MURDER ME. With help but that’s a story for another day.
-He googled
•Sentencing for manslaughter
•he googled varies things like (how to convince police in the interview)
•watching YouTube videos
•Ted bundy videos
•Knife<- he brought it a day before the incident but googled the shop to by it from
-Can the police trace FaceTime calls (then after searching called a member of his family)
^ this is only some of what he searched and watched.
He also wrote a letter which got found ‘later in the day of incident’ but really the person had it for a week before this whole situation if they done the right thing this could of been prevented but to protect him LIED.
The night of the 23rd June I had a weird feeling so I actually put the children in my room I didn’t go to sleep until 2am but I went for a fag locking my doors and went to bed like normal. I wake up to a knife to my throat, my instinct thought I was having a nightmare but it hit me this was real and was I going to die? I believed so, was the children going to die? I believed that too. He told me and words I’ll never forget, ‘you will die today’ and ‘if I can’t have you no one can’.
A conversation between me and K happened because I hoped I could prevent anything bad happening. He had my phone and started going through it accusing me of sleeping with people which I denied to him because that was not the case he just wanted to find anything to give him reason to kill me.
He then proceeds to call a member of his family to tell them ‘I am here now’, there was a text message also from the member of his family saying ‘be careful because of evidence’. K asked the person to pick the children up so me and him could go for a drive but this did not happen.
The police got called though by the member of family because a police car came past, my house was flagged so they got there very fast. K saw the police come past and I said ‘I didn’t call you’ve got my phone’. The police knocked on the door but I was stuck on my bed with the kids and too afraid to move. K went onto the landing which I had my grey blanket over and he set light to it. Also chucked down the stairs a 5ft-6ft dolls house and other toys belonging to the children. The police where trying to get in so K then set alight the children’s bedroom.
The police which felt a life time managed to smash the door and move the toys to get in and came up stairs in this time K went behind me holding the knife to my throat. I had the children one in each arm, begging him not to do this and one officer telling him to put the knife down and let us go. The police officer had a taser on him so K said he was going to slice my throat. I was petrified so in my head someone was going to die, or I would die with my children in my arms or they would die in my arms. The room started becoming black. I needed to protect my babies so I grabbed the knife. He lost balance and started going down as they then used the taser and all of a sudden I just felt 3 punches to my shoulder. Also hearing the police officer was stabbed in his hand by the knife. The children was screaming I was screaming and crying and one police grabbed one child and I managed to hold the other to get out from the house. This was all on footage.
The street was surrounded by fire brigade, police and shortly after ambulance. K got detained.
Me and the children was checked because the taser skimmed me and one of the children so our eyes were burning. Helped with my wounds and checked the children over due to smoke inhalation.
Every single night I see his face in mine.
The anxiety waiting for court to happen scared he’d be allowed out and then the case being adjourned twice. I faced standing in court scared having to be so close to him.
Then reading articles which cover the parts which made them feel better and not being able to say the truth and detail.
On the 30th May, he got a life sentence 32 years and minimum of 19 years 31 days. I cried. He showed no remorse.
PC Pawley, PC Langmead and PC Davies saved our lives. One being left with not being able to use one of his fingers and all 3 scarred for life.
^ these police officers are a credit and I understand people do not believe in police but these proved me wrong. I am glad they are getting recognition for the incident.
I am hoping soon enough me and the children get support because unfortunately you have to sit on waiting lists.
But…
I want to say if you’re going through DV,DA or SA please speak up because there is help out there and you will be safe. I use to be a shy girl and forever blamed myself as I was made to believe it but NO! You’re strong and a lot clever than them. You don’t feel believed? I believe you!
This isn’t just for women because men go through it aswell, but please get help.
If you get into a new relationship and you don’t really no them, they have a new Claire’s Law which will give you a background check on your partner! Use this please because I wish I did.
Also if anyone thinks it’s acceptable to participate to help people with someone else’s actions remember whether you’ve got your own family or not, STOP! <- it is not okay!
^moving past that, please feel free to share this because I hope if anyone needs the help I am willing to help. DO NOT FEEL AFRAID TO JUST MESSAGE ME ANY TIME EVEN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. It WILL STAY CONFIDENTIAL BETWEEN ME AND YOU UNLESS YOU SAY DIFFERENT
